GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
My breath smells like gin and sadness
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
