Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
