spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
