is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
