i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
