clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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