people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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