Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize