3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
