Jerry, you need to find god
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
she told me i tasted like america
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
