i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I love having hate sex.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
