I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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