Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
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