your room smells of hookers.
And success
hell yes lets make some ravioli
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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