filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
