Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
