so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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