They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
