she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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