True but thats because hes a fetus.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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