Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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