I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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