..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
