Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
