So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
