i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
