I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
