She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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