ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
