so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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