when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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