No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
