I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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