okay pat passed out under dana's car
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize