I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
We got so high we made milksteak
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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