There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize