when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
