shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
time to smoke my breakfast
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
