Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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