dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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