There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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