Buhtt sex?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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