dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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