Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
No subtext here. People are naked.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
