between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
