these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
nutella sex= disaster
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
