just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm getting married
To pizza
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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