You work out of a Hotel?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
