he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
