Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
