I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
