On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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